◦ Currently Feeling... amused.
◦ Listening To: Savin' Me on Pandora radio
◦ Eating/Drinking: Orange Juice Slushie <3
HAY GUYS. THIS JOURNAL DOESN'T HAVE WHINY COMPLAINING! :D
So I was lookin' up some stuff on the Monolophosaurus for a commission. And Monolophosaurus is just fun to say out loud, btw. Do it. Like.. three times in a row. Now, yell it like it's barreling down on you in Jurassic Park.
Olol.
Now you know why movies like The Land Before Time just came up with their own names. Screaming "SHAARPTOOOTH!!!" Is so much easier than "MONOLOPHOSAURUS!!!" For srs. It just doesn't have that same affect if it's a mouthful. :B
Anyways.
I was lookin' at dinosaurs online last night.
And I was thinking of how cool it would be if they were still alive. :< I mean, come on, they're frickin' sweet. So I was kinda like "God, why didn't you keep 'em all alive? They're awesome..."
And that got me thinking...
Parents warn their kids about stray dogs being dangerous. Depending on where you are, you may be keeping an eye out for poisonous snakes. Perhaps you even have to watch out for mountain lions, panthers, or bears. Farmers have to keep dogs, coyotes, foxes, wolves, ect out of their livestock. Occasionally, they'll send their own dogs after.. rabbits and deer munching on their crops.
Now, some of these animals are pretty afraid of you. Most would try running before attacking, and usually out of defense. Granted, some may think you're tasty and attack you, but really.. It's not that common.
BUT.
Imagine if you also had to keep an eye out for carnivorous beasties that don't only come for your cows, but when hungry, come looking for you. Granted, I don't think all meat-lover-dinosaurs go hunting for living flesh, but I'm pretty sure not all of them were scavengers.
This is a Segisaurus. He is carnivorous and was found in Arizona.
But he's not that big. You generally think of dinosaurs as Giant Beasts. Well.. Allow me to point out that he is the size of a dog. And I'm willing to bet he was pretty fast and had ninja reflexes.
So imagine yourself.. I dunno, walking out one morning to your chicken coop. Nice refreshing morning. You get some food for your chickens, walk to the coop, and notice it's oddly quiet. You peak inside and there's Mr. Segisaurus, waiting for you 'cause he heard you coming. And he's killed/eaten/lacerated all of your flock and can sense your fear.
AND BAM. One good strike and yer dead. Or you lost a leg or something. Because you is a delicate, fragile fleshy humanoid thing.
BUT IT GETS WORSE!
This is a Gorgosaurus. He was found in Alberta, Montana, and Arizona.
And he is no dinky mini dino. He could take out your cow in one bite, man. Or for that matter, your kid.
Okayokay. So those guys are obviously dangerous to mankind and their ways of living. They'd be great for border control, but.. yeah.. We're looking to keep illegal folks out, not sick our local beasties after their fleshy rears and blame it on hungry nature.
Now what about those herbivores? Harmless right? Well, sure to an extent. Any animal can be dangerous, but for the most part, it'd be okay... Some may be as big are your house, but.. as long as they don't step on it, it might be okay. Granted, they may use your house as a stepping stone to get those tasty leaves from the tree behind it... but whatever, right? They'd be cool, right? ... Right?
WRONG. EVEN HERBIVORES CAN BE TREACHEROUS.
This, dear readers, is a Brachiosaurus. He's huuuuge. Like, around 30 meters. That's nearly 95 feet.
Lemme put that into perspective with Generic 6ft Man Picture.
*Thump*
"Mommy, what's that?"
"It's thunder, dear.
*THUMP*
"... Are you sure?"
"Of course, dear."
*THUMP*
And upon looking outside, Mr. Brachy is stomping the neighboring subdivision to bits in search of tasty trees! OHSNAP!
"Look, Mommy! A giant lizard!"
"... @#$!!"
Kids would not only have to do those annoying fire drills, but probably go through an entire "What To Do In Case a Brachiosaurus Appears" class. And political dudes would probably make schools do insane Brachiosaurus Drills just to make sure they know how to escape without scaring the thing into stomping the town flat.
...
And much to your dismay, this post goes on, as I must introduce you to another freakishly large herbivorous dinosaur that totally spells disaster for humanity.
The Seismosaurus.
This guys is apparently 40+ meters in length. 40 meters alone is 131 feet. Could you imagine bigger than that?
You think those little deer warning signs are pesky enough? How about a Seismosaurus warning billboard? With a little Generic Man beside it to remind you how ridiculously small you are in comparison?
I can hear it now. The emergency alert sound buzzing across your radio. It's not stormy. Is it a test? No.. NO.. It's an alert from the Seismosaurus Tracking Center! OMG THERE'S A SEISMO SPOTTING IN YOUR CITY! You would be advised to take your family and valuables, and flee from its path.
It could march through NYC and be a Cloverfield Monster. What could you do against it? Kill it? While it marches through your towns? Trying to get rid of that thing would be one heck of an endeavor. Even if you did kill it, dude.. What if it started decomposing? And everyone had to leave the area? Gnarly right? It's waaaay worse than getting rid of a beached whale corpse or something.
I could so go into depth with that.. but it's kinda grody, no?
And I'm sorry, but this guy could eat your entire farmland in one day.
See? Even the "harmless" herbivores aren't so harmless.
Maybe I don't have to ask God why the dinosaurs died out. Maybe I figured out why, just by babbling.
One, they'd kill modern civilization if we didn't kill them first.. Or at least contain them.. in which they'd promptly eat all the food, each other, their keepers, ect. Two... I dunno, but I'm pretty sure Seissy and most of his buddies didn't fit too well on Noah's ark. xD They'd probably make snacks out of everyone else. You gotta think.. Dinosaurs? Or everything else? ... Yeah. Tough decision, I know.
Dear, God... Thank you for thinking of my existence when you let them all die out. I don't particularly think being stomped by Seissy or gutted by Gorgo sounds too pleasant.
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